On leaning in.

Dear Sheryl Sandberg,

I read about your book. The one where you tell women in technology to “lean in”. The one where you tell women in technology not to “leave before you leave”. But what if you lean in and they punch you in the face? What if you lean in and they tell you to back off? What if you lean in and they say “That’s not the way we lean around here?” What if you lean in and they become so focused on your breasts they can’t look you in the face?

And yet, in spite all of that, you stick around. You don’t “leave before you leave” in an effort to pave the way for females after you, but still read about the Lilly Ledbetter Act being violated every day. You don’t “leave before you leave” in an effort to encourage girls to enter STEM fields, but still see smart, spirited women labeled “bitch” and “cunt” while exhibiting the same behavior for which men are labeled “a born leader” and “strong”. You don’t “leave before you leave” even though you’re tired, tired, tired of how the more things change, the more they stay the same.

What then, Ms Sandberg? What then? Perhaps, dear Sheryl, women in technology aren’t the ones who need to lean in.