Was Zum Teufel?!
Tues Jan 15 – During this week of still-getting- adjusted-to-life-on-the-east-coast, who-the-hell-moved-my-goddamn-cheese, I thought I’d change the topic of this week’s WZT. I’m going to write about design instead. Since the whole purpose of me practicing my writing via this column is so that I can do more design criticism anyway, right? The dogs, of course, will probably slip in.
Today began with my getting frustrated, depressed, and downright angry that DC is not Seattle. And it ended with my continued thoughts on how a city is like a product. If the city is poorly designed or the interactions within the urban structure don’t match your existing mental models, then it’s a frustrating product to use. Grrrrr….
Wed Jan 16 – Today began and ended exactly the same way yesterday did – frustrating! In addition, Oslo mistook the leaf blower man across the street at the Cathedral for Will. Ironically, this happened only moments after I’d told Will that his fashion sense (a form of design, n’est-ce pas?) had fallen dramatically in the several months we lived apart; I am his acting stylist who was MIA on a daily basis for seven months. I am also vindicated; thank you, Oslo.
Thurs Jan 17 – In today’s news, I continue to flounder my way around DC, flapping my fins and flaccid tail around the perimeter like a fish out of water. Things that took me mere minutes to figure out in the Emerald City now take three times as long. Why? For starters, the mental model of an urban space that I have in my head, the one I’ve used for the past ten years, does not work here. I have to use a map for EVERYTHING. And even if I do find certain similar things with maps, others simply do not exist. Like my favorite coffee shop, for example. Or Glazer’s or Metropolitan Market or the Seattle Public Library or the Five Spot or my eye doctor or Marymoor or the Space Needle or Dilletante or Elliott Bay or Lake Washington or or or…the list goes on.
Fri Jan 18 – Not to be confused with yesterday, but today begins with more floundering. And with my explaining to you what the heck a mental model is. A mental model is a picture, or series of pictures, you have in your head (based on experience) that constructs what something is and how it works. For example, see the image of that bottle up there? Chances are, you think it’s a bottle containing alcohol, right? Because it’s shaped like a flask. Your mental model of a bottle that’s shaped like a flask says that there’s alcohol in it. Hard alcohol, too. We’re not talking beer, here. Well, in actuality, that bottle is indeed shaped like a flask, but it does not contain alcohol. Instead, it contains water. Designer water. That the privileged political elite in DC like to drink because the tap water here tastes like crap.
Another simple example is…say…a dog. If you came to my house and one of my Weimaraners greeted you with a meow instead of a bark, you would be confused – if not amazed – because that dog would be fucking with your mental model of what a dog should sound like. Got it? If not, read more about mental models here and here.
Sat Jan 19 – The weekend started with my dropping a glove while pulling out my subway card to put it in the turnstile. I was with my friend Kimi (a former co-worker and Seattle native) and the train was pulling to a stop, so I left the glove because I didn’t want to miss the train. In terms of mental models, the one I have of subways is actually being formed with the DC system, so that’s a plus. I’ve ridden the New York City subway, the Paris Métro, and BART, but not enough to have really formed a concrete image of how one works. I will also say that in terms of design, the DC subway is very user-friendly. And, ironically, I found some old tactile maps from the DC Transit Authority that I had used as part of my thesis. One of the few examples of tactile maps that I could find. So, kudos to them for that.
But Oslo and Mies are bummed that dogs aren’t allowed on the subway. They’re not allowed on the buses here, either, which totally sucks.
Sun Jan 20 – Today begins with a relief from my cognitive overload caused by my having too little knowledge in my head and too much knowledge in the world (see Monday’s entry). When I stay within the realms of my immediate neighborhoods (e.g., Cathedral Heights, Glover Park, and Georgetown), I can relax a little and enjoy DC for what it is. Because, despite my apparent complaining, DC is a very nice city. The architecture here is amazing; Seattle really has nothing like it. I like the weather (sunny, cold and dry) and that Glover Archibald Park is only ten minutes from our apartment. And I love Georgetown. It’s the one place I’ve found where I can get good espresso and amazing croissants. At Café Bonaparte, as mentioned previously, and at this place, Le Pâtisserie Poupon. I also discovered an Illy Caffé at M Street and New Hampshire.
Oslo and Mies like Le Pâtisserie Poupon best. The owner came out to admire the Weims and told me they’re welcome on the patio or on the covered porch in the back anytime. They also know they’ll get a morsel of tasty croissant because I’m a sucker for their pleading eyes.