Was Zum Teufel?!
Tuesday, Oct 23 – During this week of World Series baseball (which I couldn’t care less about even though I was rooting for my home-state team, the Rockies) and alleged pissed off Mexicans setting the state of California on fire, today brought bee-YOO-tee-ful weather to the Pacific Northwest. The Weims thought someone had turned the calendar back to July. But of course this won’t last. Why? Because the Mother Nature here in our neck of the woods should be taking Lithium, that’s why. Here, I’ll just say it again: Seattle weather sucks.
It was also brought to my attention today that the term "Grey Ghosts" does not only apply to Weimaraners. From a post on Google Groups:
Before Danny Casolaro died, the journalist had been investigating the activities of America’s private security companies which, according to Sterling Seagrave, are linked to the ‘Grey Ghosts’ – an army of professional killers commissioned by the Pentagon to carry out assassinations.
Hmmmm…. Makes me wonder if they have a Weimaraner logo emblazoned on their bullet proof vests? And we all thought pit bulls had a bad rap.
Wednesday, Oct 24 – In today’s news, Mies continues to find ways into the cupboards, despite the fact that they’re six feet above the ground. When I got home after class tonight, half of my French butter dish was on the living room floor, licked clean as a whistle. The other half was still on the cupboard shelf, a shelf that should be way beyond his reach. In addition, a partially eaten piece of pizza that I left in the sink before I dashed off to class was also gone.
Since this dog apparently has no problems accessing high cupboards and reaching into and out of the sink, I wonder why he can’t do the dishes while I’m gone instead? Because today’s news also announces the death of our dishwasher. RIP In-Sink-Erator.
Thursday, Oct 25 – Today was not a good day. It brought the tragic news of one of Mies’s siblings being hit by a car on Wednesday and having her leg amputated. For those of you who don’t know shit about dogs, this kind of news to people who loved that dog is the same as hearing that a human in your life suffered a similar event. Maybe even worse. Dogs are 100% vulnerable and innocent. People are not. As a matter of fact, most people are assholes (see the United States government and the above-mentioned other Grey Ghosts).
Friday, Oct 26 – In light of Mies’s previously mentioned amazing digestive system, news today includes a conversation I had with my friend, Rocky. You know, the one who owns Parker, the cranky little Fox Terrier.
Anyway, Parker is as accomplished a scavenger as Mies, if not more so. So while Rocky and I were walking the dogs tonight, talking about some of the amazing items we have found in our dogs’ stool as of late, our conversation turned to the topic of drug smuggling and the heroin pellet-swallowing scenes in the film Maria, Full of Grace. And we both wondered out loud, could this be a career option for our two mischievous little dogs? I mean, smear those heroin pellets with peanut butter and, like medicine with a spoon full of sugar, they’d go right down!
Okay, seriously though. That’s not even funny. I’m sure that’s been tried before and the dogs are the ones who suffered.
Saturday, Oct 27 –
As this photo illustrates, today was Dog-O-Ween at Genesee Park, one of Seattle’s many off-leash areas. When my friend Katie and I first went to Champion’s to look at doggie costumes, Oslo saw the canine Chippendale costume and said he wanted to be a stripper with Mies going as his Pimp. I said, "No, Oslo. That’s too degrading. I don’t care if you are a prize-winning stud." So, since we wanted to dress the dogs as a group (Katie has two – Allie, a Chow mix who looks like a teddy bear, and Miles, a quirky little Jack Russell mix) we had a great idea upon spotting some purple tutus.
So, here you have them! Sugar Plum Fairies from the Nutcracker. My friend Neha was appalled that I would dress my dogs in skirts, but hey! This is Seattle. Transvestites are in (you should know this, Neha; you live on Capitol Hill!).
Sunday, Oct 28 – Nothing happened today, unless you count some guy who doesn’t know shit about dogs walking past me and the Weims during our evening stroll and remarking, "Oh! Labradors!"
Ummmmm, no.
Nothing against Labs, but if you can’t tell a Weimaraner from a Lab, well….you’re…. Right. Don’t even ask.
Monday, Oct 29 – This morning commenced with what I consider to be an amazing lesson in what I have coined "veterinary forensic gastroenterology". Now, I know this blog has lots and lots of references to dog poop, but when you live with two large hunting dogs, well….what can I say.
Anyway, Mies’s stool this morning contained several handfuls of undigested nuts. Oslo’s contained zero handfuls of undigested nuts. As a matter of fact, not only did his contain zero handfuls, there was not one single nut to be found in Oslo’s stool. Now, if one were to use this evidence in the investigation of the crime committed the night before (e.g., somebody getting into my hiking pack while I was gone, unzipping all the compartments, finding and then devouring the contents of a Rubbermaid container full of m&m-laced trail mix) what might one conclude? That Mies is the culprit!
I’ve had my breeder ask me when telling her tales of Mies’s mis-adventures, "How do you know it was Mies and not Oslo?" Well, because. I just know. But now, I have forensic evidence to prove it!
In other news, Oslo continues working toward his therapy dog certificate from the Delta society. And Kia, Mies’s injured sister, is slowly but surely recovering, although it will be a good 6-8 weeks before she’s completely out of the woods. The Weimaraner community I am involved in has shown a great deal of love and support, a true testament to dogs’ abilities to bring out the best in people.
If any of you reading this would like to donate to her mounting veterinary bills, please contact me at forkia@callieneylan.com
Or, if not to Kia, please consider a contribution to your local humane society, for those abandoned pets who also need access to good veterinary care.